You can only really appreciate great sex - and I mean truly great sex - when you've experienced not so great sex. While I can say that I've had the joy of good sex, it wasn’t always that way. When I lost my virginity, the only thing I could say about the whole experience was that I was bored. I was so bored, in fact, that I turned on the television and asked him to try doggy-style positioning just so I could watch TV while he finished. It was a terrible introduction into the wondrous world of sex. Needless to say, the relationship didn't last. Yet, that wasn't such a bad thing. It meant that I got to move on to other partners, who helped me realize how great sex can be. I moved on to other partners and learned just how awesome sex can be. Here are 6 signs that you've just had great sex.
The Best You’ve Ever Had
After a really good sexual experience, I often find myself daydreaming about the encounter for days, weeks or even months later. I will remember the experience in such detail that I can almost feel it all over again. When you relive the moment vividly, again and again, you know you had a really good time. (Read more about it in This Is Your Brain On Sex.)
It Won’t Stop
Sometimes sex is sooo good you want to go at it again - refractory time be damned! When you want to repeat the performance multiple times to exhaustion before your feel satisfied, you know you've got it right.
It Puts You to Sleep
An insatiable desire for a rematch can be one sign of really great sex, but sometimes an amazing romp has just the opposite effect. You only need one good performance to turn your legs to Jell-O. Getting up off the bed feels like a chore. Your legs are shaking and/or feel rubbery. Your brain is incapable of thought beyond "Damn!" You've had it: Great sex. Up next: An amazing night's sleep.
It Makes You Emotional
I once had an experience with someone that brought about a surge of heavy emotions. Inexplicably, I found myself wanting to smile and cry simultaneously. I could only describe the experience as beautiful, and have never quite felt anything like it before or since. To feel so very connected to someone in the moment, and have your emotions be in such a flux afterward is often a sign of great sex - and a great connection!
It Makes You Laugh
Sex is great, but it isn’t like in the movies. Shit happens that no one can account for and in many cases, it's hilarious. When you're having great sex with a great partner, you should be comfortable enough to laugh about it. If the person I am with and I have the ability to laugh through whatever just happened, I know I just had a good time no matter how the sex turns out . Many people take sex so seriously, have high expectations, or are so insecure that they forget to have fun. You won't get fireworks and multiple orgasms every time, but if you're able to laugh through embarrassing moments, you'll probably have a blast anyway.
It Fulfills Your Fantasy
Sometimes, great sex is about fulfilling a fantasy. That often means trying something brand spanking new in the sack. To make it work, you'll need a creative partner who's open to hearing what it is you want, need, or are curious about. Creativity also incorporates exploration, which often means pushing your limits and exploring beyond traditional erogenous zones. Partners who are willing to think outside the box and try new things often make for exciting, and memorable, sex. Breaking new ground should leave you feeling impressed and inspired - both by your partner and yourself. Creativity and newfound confidence? Now that's a sign of great sex. (Get some ideas in Beyond Plain Vanilla: 8 New Things to Learn in the Bedroom.)
This is hardly an exhaustive list, but if you aren't sure you're having great sex and want to start, try bringing passion, a sense of humor and an open mind into the bedroom. When those things join you and a willing partner, good things tend to happen.
