Have you ever considered controlling your partner's orgasms - or lack thereof? Whether you're in love with the idea of constant denial or you find the idea of total control to be a turn-on, chastity can be a fun activity for couples to pursue.
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Chastity involves a device, which specifically inhibits masturbation and pleasure, being locked onto the chaste person's body, while the controlling partner holds the key and decides when the locked partner will be released. The controlling partner is usually called the "keyholder."
One of the most popular chastity devices are cock cages, usually made of plastic or metal that fit over the head of the penis or cover the whole shaft and are locked on. They restrict erections and make penetrative sex pretty much impossible. Any that are meant to be worn for a while have some functionality to enable urinating and cleaning.
Some couples find it enjoyable to play with chastity short-term, for a few hours or a day, while others lock-in for the long haul and go for extended periods of time. Remember, health and safety is important! If the device hinders good hygiene, the keyholder will need to make allowances for cleaning breaks.
Both partners need to enthusiastically consent to the arrangement and have an unbreakable covenant that if the safeword/gesture is enacted, the scene will end.
No matter what gender or power exchange status of the couple, this can be a fun and enjoyable way to keep both people's attention on the sexual aspect of a relationship.
Read: Erotic Torture: 10 Tips For Choosing a Chastity Device
While chastity is certainly an enjoyable activity in itself, some couples find themselves a bit bored by the standard "Can I be unlocked now?" that comes up from long-term chastity arrangements. After all, after your partner has been denied for three months, the standard "no" can start to seem a bit boring!
Adding a bit more variety to your new kink is as simple as utilizing a chastity "game." Not only does it take some of the pressure off of you, as the keyholder, but it also provides an "unknown" aspect to chastity. Consider some of these simple games for chastity fun, or use these games as inspiration to make up one of your own:
Game of Chance
For fun for both of you, consider utilizing a game of chance. Take time to write down various rewards and punishments on little slips of paper. Consider things like "10 minutes of edging,", "5 minutes with your favorite sex toy", "3 more days of chastity," "Pegging," "Back massage," "Intercourse with no orgasm," "30 strokes with your favorite impact play toys", and other things. If you want to make it less sexual, feel free to include blank slips or include chores like "Clean the shower", "Do a 30 minute workout", or anything else you have in mind.
If you don't want to allow your partner to orgasm, just don't include any slips that allow it (and you don't even have to tell your partner that you didn't!). You can put these little slips into any small, sealable containers to ensure the slips stay a surprise.
Read: Orgasm Denial? It's More Fun Than You Might Think!
Now, the two of you select a piece of paper every day and carry out what's written inside.
If you want to put more of the power back into your hands, consider a less automated system. Your partner can only earn one of the chances after they've done things you consider worth rewarding. Did they give you a fantastic orgasm with your favorite Evolved Trifecta? Well, they can earn the chance to open one of the eggs and see what it says!
Social Media Involvement
Quite a few chastity couples enjoy blogging or writing about their adventures online. If you're one of those couples, you can take your game to the Internet! Create a poll for followers to vote on an activity. Do they want your next adventure to feature your locked partner using a strap-on to pleasure you, or get things buzzing with an e-stim cage?
Consider letting your readers vote on how long your partner should stay locked up - or assign numerical values to various tasks your readers can do. For example, for every "like" your post gets, you might decide that your partner is adding another three days in chastity.
You might want to set a "limit" here, though. Depending on your popularity, you might find that your partner ends up locked for 3 years if you try this one!
Get a Perfect Ten
This one can be particularly fun - and it can be modified to fit any activity you see fit. Demand your chaste partner perform a particular activity - whether it be oral sex, loading the dishwasher, folding the clothes, a handjob, using an e-stim vibrator on you, or anything else.
When they're done, rate them on a scale from 1 to 10 - y'know, like a professional athlete might be rated. For every digit lower than 10 they are, add a day or two onto their chastity. A score of "10" could mean they get unlocked.
Depending on how you're feeling, you might just think they're never quite "deserving" of that perfect 10 - to keep your partner in everlasting chastity until you determine otherwise.
You can also choose to continue to redo the activity until they've "perfected" the skill you want them to know. For example, the first time they give you oral sex, they may only earn a "4." That means six more days of chastity. Six days later, you'll let them retry - and maybe they get a "5" this time. Five more days then. You can keep this up until they get that perfect "10." Then they'll truly "deserve" to be unlocked.
Read: How to Give Great Oral Sex
Key Hide-and-Seek
This one can be particularly entertaining - and can go on for a long time. Just like the standard version of this game, the keyholder is going to hide the key somewhere in an agreed-upon location (such as "within our home" or "within the bedroom").
The chaste partner will get unlocked if they can find the key within the agreed time limit. (Or, remove the time limit entirely, and this game can go on for weeks!)
To make this task particularly fun, demand that the chaste partner clean-up or tidy up any area where they search for the key. You'll get a clean house - and they might get a chance at being unlocked!
Roll of the Dice
As punishment for any bad behavior, you can pull out the dice. Roll your set of dice, and add on that many days of chastity to the count. Use more dice (or nerdy D20 sets!) if you really want to be cruel. Your partner will certainly think twice before misbehaving next time.
Who knew dice could be such a punishment?
Bonus: Quiz Time!
If you have a locked partner who particularly needs to study or learn a topic, this one is for you! Doing your own bit of research, you'll need to come up with questions about the topic - maybe 10 or 20 questions. Before the game, agree upon how many days of chastity each missed answer is worth. They'll certainly be more inclined to study next time if you decide each wrong answer means another three days of chastity!
The Bottom Line
I bet you never knew keyholding could turn into such a fun and playful experience, did you? While you're certainly denying your partner's orgasm, it doesn't have to always be so serious. Consider playing chastity games, such as these, on occasion to keep things feeling fresh. Use these games or take inspiration and make your own!
Interest piqued? Kinkly Shop offers an all-in-one Chasitity Bundle, with a cage, locking key case, and strap-on harness that is specially designed to wear with a chastity device. We foresee a lot of fun in your future!