My Partner has a Praise Kink, What Can I Say?

If your significant other is an auditory learner, seeks positive reinforcement, or claims that words of affirmation is their love language, they may have a Praise Kink: A sexual desire to receive praise in order to get off. For any modern day Shakespeare, appeasing a praise kink may not feel like a challenge. But if you don’t have a way with words, coming up with new ways to compliment your partner in bed can make sex feel daunting.

Not to worry. Satisfying your partner’s praise kink doesn’t require a knack for writing sonnets. Here’s a list of grab-and-go compliments you can take to the bedroom in a pinch, based on your partner’s personality type. Whether they’re an active practitioner of BDSM, or simply a romantic who wouldn’t mind hearing you express some admiration in the act, here are some praises to keep in your back pocket.

Praise Kink Cheat Sheet: Here’s What To Say

Remember, any of these praises can be altered based on the sexual orientation of your partner or partnership. Happy praising!

For the bratty submissive

If your partner is somewhat of a brat, or a submissive who loves to misbehave, here are some praises to pull out when you succeed in taming them.

• Atta girl.
• You’re so sexy when you don’t get your way.
• It makes me so hard when I put you in your place.
• I get so wet when you roll your eyes at me.
• You make disrespect sound so hot.
• You’re so beautiful when you struggle for me.

For the the body positive

Your partner wants to feel like sex personified while you’re in the throes of passion. Give some extra love to what makes their physicality so sexy with these compliments:

• You make the hottest faces when we fuck.
• Your ass is so soft.
• I’ve been thinking about how hot your body is all day.
• I can’t believe this is all mine.
• What a pretty pussy.
• I can’t wait to show you off.

For the action-oriented lover

Don’t underestimate the ways you can use the praise kink to your advantage. If your partner likes to take a little direction, use these keywords to tap into their love of praise while also making what you want known.

• I love it when you look me in the eyes when you’re going down on me. It’s so erotic.
• You please me so much when you look at me while you’re blowing me.
• Cum again for me. You’ve done such a good job.
• Just like that.
• Sit still so I can look at how beautiful you are.
• So good, baby. Now faster.

For the pet play enthusiast

“Good girl” and “good boy” are synonymous with pet play. Add these phrases to your toolkit for a little pizzazz when you’re engaging with your puppy, kitten, or pony.

• The way you whimper turns me on so much.
• I’m sure you can get out of your restraints. Such a strong girl.
• What an adorable little thing you are.
• You take it so well for me, pet.
• You look so precious when you’re needy.
• You’re my favorite toy.

Read more: Beginner's Guide to Pet Play

For the romantic

A praise kink doesn’t always have to have emphasis on the “kink.” One of these statements will go a long way in making your partner feel loved up.

• I’m so proud of you.
• You’re a treasure.
• You make me very happy.
• You’re safe with me.
• I can’t get enough of you and how you make me feel.
• Thank you for being who you are.

For the long distance partner

Being apart doesn’t have to dull the erotic effect of being praised. Whip these out during a Zoom play session or simply over text to get their wheels turning.

• The way you touch yourself is the stuff of my dreams.
• You make such pretty sounds. Moan for me.
• It makes me smile that you’re so hard and I haven’t even touched you.
• You’ve been so patient for me. I appreciate you.
• Look at me. Good girl.
• You have a perfect penis. I wish I could take it in my mouth.

For the humiliation fetishist

The humiliation fetish and the praise kink go hand in hand. Elevate the degradation factor with your words by dolling out the following praises.

• You’re such a perfect little slut for me.
• You’re a pleasure to use.
• You know how to make your Master feel so good.
• You look so cute on your knees.
• Seeing you squirm is so adorable.
• What you’re doing with your hips is so deliciously slutty.
• Naughty girl (or boy)

For the words of affirmation seeker

If your partner identifies their love language as words of affirmation, they could be leaning into their praise kink as a way to get that verbal reinforcement that lights them up inside. Here are some easy phrases to let them know how much you value them.

• Nobody else could satisfy me like you.
• Your tongue feels unbelievable.
• Your body was made for me.
• Look how well you take me. You’re fucking perfect.
• I love how well you know my body.
• Fuck, you’re so powerful.

For the “Type A” submissive

Sometimes, you need to be told when to let go and give into your primal urges. Coax that inner animal out of your partner with these praise kink options.

• You’re so sexy when you lose control.
• That’s it. Let it go.
• Good boys don’t cum. And you’re a good boy.
• I love to make you feel good, princess.
• Sing for me, little bird.
• Does it feel good? You deserve it.
• Go ahead, kitten. Take the reins.