But the reality is so very different from the fantasy porn provides. Ball gags have their place in kink exploration, especially if you're interested in D/s dynamics.
My first ball gag experience was with a homemade one: a leather shoelace threaded through a hollow practice golf ball. It didn't muffle much sound, but it made it difficult to pronounce, and the holes let more drool pass through, which was indeed very humiliating. The ball was small, and it didn't force my jaw open as wide as the stuff you see online.
Sure, you can use ball gags for the visuals. It's pretty striking. But for me, it's not about how attractive or shocking it makes me; it's about the vulnerability it provides.
When my partner makes me wear a ball gag, it means "I am taking away your speech". Being unable to speak is sometimes a blessing: you can let your more animal, instinctual reactions take over. (Of course, whenever you are gagged, you should have a safe sign; my partner gives me keys to throw away if I need to stop.) When you can't speak, sometimes, you let go of your need to vocalize and analyze your experience, and you can simply feel. Letting go is what great sex is all about. A lot of people need a cue, like a gag, to get there.
Being unable to speak is sometimes a blessing: you can let your more animal, instinctual reactions take over.
When my partner makes me wear a ball gag, it means "Trust me". Agreeing to wear it means "I trust you to not harm me". Since you can't speak, you need to trust your partner to understand how you feel with just the way you move and react. You need to trust your partner to make decisions for you based on their knowledge of your desires and needs, rather than on direct feedback.
