Interestingly, these numbers are quite different in queer or lesbian relationships. In fact, in same-sex relationships, both partners achieve orgasm at higher rates, while in heterosexual relationships, it's women who tend to miss out.
"Part of the problem is failure to understand female anatomy and the role that the clitoris plays in the female orgasm,” Wider said. So, in celebration of this year's National Sex Day, we are celebrating orgasm - and advocating for an end to the so-called "orgasm gap." Here are some tips on how to do that.
Read: Top Tips for Charming a Clitoris
Achieve an Orgasm
Orgasm spots can actually change, with time and with your partner. On this day, try something new with someone you’re seeing or during a fantasy while masturbating. Since orgasms can reduce stress and anxiety, and improve sleep, getting off is a healthy thing. Of course, we don’t always have orgasms on command - there isn’t an easy button to press to achieve a feel-good moment. But exploring on your own, as well as with someone else, can create a way to find your pleasure - and own it.
Close the Orgasm Gap
"Women are more likely to experience an orgasm during sexual activity that includes oral sex,” Wider says. She suggests that communication is key for “reciprocity and a healthy sex life.” Communication can close the orgasm gap. “And if something isn't working, like for example, vaginal lubrication, a common issue among women - she shouldn't be embarrassed or ashamed to discuss it openly. Most times, adding a product like K-Y is enough to do the trick,” she says. Moreover, prioritizing a cis-male's orgasm is a cultural problem - women have been programmed, in heteronormative relationships, to put other people's pleasure before their own. And since 61 percent of women do this, it’s imperative that we begin to speak up for our likes and dislikes. Closing this gap, and reclaiming your own sexual pleasure, can improve your all-around well-being.
