Read: I Spent a Week Naked in Public Without Shaving Any Part of My Body
Can Trimming Your Pubes Really Make You Feel Better?
After reading a piece in Mel Magazine, “Feeling Down? Try Trimming Your Pubes” I was intrigued. As someone who stopped trimming and shaving my pubes and armpits two years ago, I’ve felt more comfortable and in tune with my body since I shelved the razor and embraced the fur. My body looks like my own, sex feels better and showers are shorter.
That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy shaving my legs, though. It’s a ritual. I feel good when I do it. I feel good afterwards. I don’t shave every day, but when I do, I often take a bath, exfoliate, and moisturize. Even though I don’t always groom now, I did for the majority of my adult life. I never associated my pubes with my hygiene, or my mental health. I don’t think many people have. I don’t think I thought of shaving my legs as a type of self-care. Yet now that I’ve reflected on it, I do think that it’s necessary to my comfort within my body. Of course, I’m a supporter of body hair. I believe that the unattainable hairless bodies in advertisements and popular culture send negative messages about unattainable ideals.
I also support the idea that it’s a choice: to shave or not to shave. And while it's easy to assume that everyone removes hair in response to societal pressure, that isn't necessarily true.
Pube Trimming as a Gift to Self
Miles Klee from Mel writes, “Pube maintenance can be a gift to yourself, not just someone else.” This is important to note. When I asked for sources for this piece, I received some combative responses as a result. People automatically assumed I was in favor of bald genitals when, in fact, I am in favor of whatever makes people feel awesome in their own skin.
“Pubes and self-esteem have, I firmly believe, a mysterious but irrefutable connection - they give shape to a hidden shame or unspoken strength” writes Klee in his light-hearted humor piece on Mel. I wanted to see if there was a truth in this. I wanted to know if people - and not just people who identified as men - found that grooming, trimming, or shaving could enhance mood and confidence.
Ginger, who is 40 years old, told me that grooming helps with her inflammatory bowel disease and herpes outbreaks. “I feel much better - body dysmorphia wise - when I’m smooth and I personally prefer sex that way.”
At the age of 12, she began using her mother’s scissors because she loved how short and neat her pubic hair looked. She didn't start grooming because she though her pubes were dirty or gross. She said that pubic hair was a sign of growth. By 15 years old she began shaving. “I discovered bikini waxes in the late '90s when the whole Brazilian trend took off with the J Sisters in New York and people like Gwyneth Paltrow extolling it,” she stated. Ginger was excited because it was now not “weird” to be bare.
“I love shaving and definitely do it for me. The only time I have not been bare is when I was shamed for it after a serious sexual assault and felt I should stop to prove I hadn't been at fault. It made me so miserable and led to so much body hatred,” said Ginger. After beginning to shave again, she stated she felt like herself. “It also makes hygiene easier for me as I have inflammatory bowel disease and it makes it easier to deal with my occasional outbreak of herpes too.”
Olivia, on the other hand, is a 27 year old queer woman who doesn’t groom her body hair as much. She says that her hair is connected to her mental health and empowerment. Olivia doesn’t shave her genitals, but does groom them whenever she finds them to be too “unruly.” However, she mostly embraces her body. She told me, “I used to enjoy shaving my legs when I was younger, or getting waxed, but I’m so much happier now that I don’t obsess over shaving.”
Catherine, a 35-year-old cis female who is queer and married said that she doesn’t shave her armpits for feminist and aesthetic reasons. She shaves her legs sporadically and grooms her bush once a month. “I find when I’m really stressed, one thing that helps is completely shaving my legs, armpits, and pubic hair - it’s like getting back to a totally blank canvas.” She makes a ritual of it by exfoliating her body afterwards and using a moisturizer. “It’s like sloughing off everything that came before and letting new growth come in,” she explained.
“Does that sound utterly bizarre?!” she asked me.
