Think back to the last time sex felt good, and you wanted it. What was different about then compared to now? Has something significant changed recently? If you had to imagine the most ideal scenario that would guarantee you would feel sexual and desirous, what would that look like? The answers to these questions will help you begin to sort our why sex has become so off-putting for you.
You also said that you aren’t feeling good about yourself and are experiencing self-consciousness. That sounds new. Are you doing anything for yourself? When was the last time you worked out, went shopping, got your hair done, or whatever was your “thing”? Are you neglecting those habits of self-care in the midst of all the other stress in your life? If yes, that's understandable. In fact, it's most people’s natural tendency. However, I must tell you that your brain is your largest sex organ. If your brain isn’t feeling good, if it's crowded and stressed and hates you, then sex isn’t going to be enjoyable any time soon. Doing things to take care of yourself, even when life is nuts, is a way of helping you to feel better and get your brain on board with experiencing pleasure.
That being said, life will never be perfect. What are the things that are turning you off? Is there something to be done about it that will alleviate them enough that you won’t feel turned off by them anymore? Or, is it more of a thing where you may need to practice a certain amount of acceptance, prioritize what matters, and simplify your life to include time for that which is enjoyable?
