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Sex education

Sex Stories We Love: Alone With Your Thoughts, Kinky Knights, and Unlikely Lubes

In this week's Sex Stories We Love, we'll examine just how sex, how we think about sex, and historical sexual information affects all of us.

For this week's Sex Stories We Love, we have to think of both the past...and the future of sex. What we feel is good or bad about sex right now was influenced by past events. Sometimes, our sex talk is just pure and fun, and other times we’re really talking about people’s lives.

A Change Is Coming...Out

There are so many misconceptions about what it is like to work in the adult industry. There are the common, daytime talk show tropes of abusive home life, sexual abuse, and drug abuse...to some, you can only get into sexual entertainment work if you’ve suffered some issue of abuse somewhere in your life. Nobody questions bankers about this. Or chefs. Or taxi drivers. Nobody ever asks the people of the porn world why they want to work in this industry. Now, Coming Out Like a Porn Star (edited by superstar Jiz Lee), one of the most anticipated sex-related books of the year, will bring the people of porn to life in a different way than we are used to seeing them. This is a fantastic advance in mainstream understanding of some truly fascinating people. This book has the potential to change our collective narrative about porn and change the conversations that revolve around it. Can’t wait to read it!

Alone With Your...Thoughts?

A few years after my vasectomy, when my new partner and I wanted to start having barrier-free sex, we agreed I would go to give a sample and have it analyzed - just to make sure there weren’t any swimmers still in the pool. I remember wondering if the facility I would visit would have any visual materials to facilitate orgasm. Turns out they did...but just in case, I brought some of my own. Call me a pragmasturbator. I just didn’t want to be left high and...longer-than-necessarily-dry. I mean, it would have happened...but I didn’t want to hang out there longer than need be. I can’t remember what they had on offer, but after reading about how other facilities go about choosing porn for pullin', I wish I could!

Just Hit Five Knuckle Shuffle

On the topic of self-love, I might have to take back my own pragmasturbator card right after coining the term because I now realize I do not have my own personal playlist for pleasure. I have to say, there are some curious choices provided by these brave folks who detail the jams they like to use while jerking-off. Some are current and some are classics. Now that I do see others doing it, I put some thought (yeah…thought) into what my own masturbation music might be, and I think I came up with my choice.

Appreciating Amy

I’ll admit, I wasn’t completely onboard with Amy Schumer at first. I know a lot of people still aren’t. I am a convert. Not being a huge fan of crass humor, I wasn’t drawn to her work in the beginning. She seemed to try too hard to “push the envelope.” Now, after seeing more, hearing more, and reading more of what she has to say, I realize she has to push that envelope until it is completely ripped apart. Schumer is breaking ground for women trying to dash the stereotypes and social assumptions that we've had ingrained in us about women and sex. She’s nailing the social commentary thing like nobody else out there today, and she’s funny while doing it. Love her or hate her, Amy Schumer is where our conversations of women and sex are at these days.

Kinky Knights

Picture corsets and capes. Gloves and leather. Kilts, cuffs, and rope galore! If you were thinking of your favorite fetish dungeon, I wouldn’t be surprised. These are just a small selection of the clothes and implements you might find in such a place. They are also some of the kinky clothes and implements at some of the super fun, and super sexy, renaissance festivals that are popular across North America.

For those who are involved in the kink community, the combination of these events and sex culture must look like a no-brainer. Those who do inhabit both communities have been drawing the two together with a presence at the usually family-oriented renaissance events. Combining the two worlds is actually a fantastic way to get out and about in your fetish wear—in broad daylight! Huzzah!

Unlikely Lubes

The other day, the topic of lube for fisting came up (Fisting Day was upon us!). My friend mentioned having recently been asked to use Crisco. I’ve heard the stories of Crisco, butter, and vegetable oil all being used for sexual slipperiness, but I've have never tried any of them. Personally speaking, I am glad that I have an array of non-food associated lovin’ lotions to choose from. Yet, even these tales didn’t prepare me for a couple of the historical lubes mentioned in this piece. DIY solutions and ingenuity really can get you everywhere...and without friction!

Jon Pressick

Jon Pressick is a sex-related media gadabout. For more than 20 years, Jon has been putting sex into our daily conversations at his long-running site SexInWords—as a writer, editor, publisher, sex toy reviewer, radio host, workshop facilitator, event producer and more. These days, he focuses on writing for Kinkly, GetMeGiddy, The Buzz and PinkPlayMags and editing Jason Armstrong's series of Solosexual books. In 2015, Jon edited Cleis Press' Best Sex Writing of the...