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Sex education

Sex Stories We Love: Enticed by Erotica, Beware of Bullshit, & S Is for Sex & Safety

In this week's Sex Stories We Love, sex as a business: from sex toys to erotica to porn - here are this week's sexy stories!

It almost seems sacrilegious to think of sex as a business. Maybe it doesn’t seem that way when you’re at home with your partners and you’re just having a great time. Yet, take a look around your den of deliciousness. Do you see the fruits of the labor of others to bring your fantasies to life? Yup, sex is a business...and business is booming. This week's Sex Stories We Love is all about the business side of sex.

Poppin' Up All Over

Back in the day (not one specific day, but every day), when I became old enough to explore sex shops, I started to take note that there were lots of products on the shelves meant to pleasure people with vulvas. Great! I like to have fun with these folks and my burgeoning toy collection started to grow. However, it wasn’t until later that I realized there weren’t too many toys out there for those of us with cocks - beyond tubes and pumps that purport to pump up penises. If you believe the stereotypes, this is the prime market for sex-related products. Well, it seems times are catching up and there are now a growing number of toys on the market for folks with penises (as well as their other sexy parts). We’re talking everything from affordable to luxury and everything in between. Get your shopping carts ready!

Who's Playing?

Of course, some of the best sex toys around are completely versatile and great for use will all bodies. If it feels good, plug it in or recharge it and use it! This same type of thinking must have been in place for many folks during the long and tumultuous history of Playgirl magazine, which was chronicled last week by Esquire. Launched back in the 1970s, it seems there was both disconnect and understanding that the pictorial content was not just being consumed by women, despite distinct efforts by ownership to ensure that. So, for many gay, bi, and questioning men, Playgirl was an “acceptable” and safe magazine to purchase, despite there also being gay porn available. Did the Internet make publications like Playgirl entirely irrelevant? I’m not sure the page has quite turned on that question yet.

Run Down by Reviews

But, let’s not take anything for granted. Whenever you intend to write about anything sexual, it is going to get tricky. Writing about sex can seem like the most fun and exciting way to explore your libidinous and literary desires. And it can be, don’t get me wrong. You can have lots of fun writing about the world of sex. One of the best ways can be as a sex toy reviewer. Seriously, masturbate with sex products and share your opinion. What could go wrong? Lots. Lots can go wrong. Yes, being a sex toy reviewer is fun and has lots of perks, but it is a job, a hard job. Like any job, it can be something that you just don’t want to participate in at all some days. I do reviews occasionally, but don’t take my word for it. If you want to know the highs and lows of sex toy reviewing, take the word of the eminent Epiphora.

Enticed by Erotica

Another way folks can get into the sex writing game is through the fiction side of things. It has been a few years since "Fifty Shades" rocked our world, but the erotica community is still going strong and thriving. If you’re into penning sexual shenanigans and fantasies, there are many different courses to take, fantastic writers to follow, and websites from which to gain useful information. Then, after you hone your voice, work on your characterization and know how to craft some truly compelling and hot sexy scenes, you might decide to submit your work to an erotica anthology. And then wait. And wait. And wait some more. This can be so frustrating but trust the amazing Rachel Kramer Bussel - this is the business of publishing.

Beware of Bullshit

A sad fact of conducting business - all business - is the potential for fraud. There are a lot of shitty people in the world who pull shitty things on good folks. Unfortunately, when someone cons or takes advantage of someone in the sex industry, you get a whole other load of shitty people saying shit like, “Well, you shouldn’t have been involved in the sex industry in the first place.” Which is, well, shit. There should be as many protections for people taken advantage of by sexual predators as there are for banks. That someone or some groups are going around tricking people into sex with the lure of performing in porn and then not providing payment is despicable...but so is the fact there is no clear-cut law under which the perpetrators of this fraud can be charge. Just shit.

S Is for Sex & Safety

Finally, have you ever wondered why there is sometime an ‘s’ added to http in URLs? Here’s why and why you should appreciate that one character the next time you do a porn search.

Jon Pressick

Jon Pressick is a sex-related media gadabout. For more than 20 years, Jon has been putting sex into our daily conversations at his long-running site SexInWords—as a writer, editor, publisher, sex toy reviewer, radio host, workshop facilitator, event producer and more. These days, he focuses on writing for Kinkly, GetMeGiddy, The Buzz and PinkPlayMags and editing Jason Armstrong's series of Solosexual books. In 2015, Jon edited Cleis Press' Best Sex Writing of the...