Undetectable Matters
Assuming that your potential partner is on antiretroviral treatment, the transmission risk involved with getting naked and getting it on is actually pretty small. A recent clinical trial called PARTNER, where couples of mixed status (one partner being HIV-positive and undetectable, and the other is HIV-negative) engaged in more than 30,000 sex acts without using condoms. Guess how many transmissions happened? Zero! Not one! The take away is: treating HIV with the meds available these days is effective in preventing new transmissions. (That isn't to say that condoms don't matter - safer sex is key! Read more about that in The Ultimate Guide to Safer Sex.)
PrEP Truvada
In addition to antiretroviral treatment and good, old fashioned barrier methods, there is a new remarkable FDA-approved daily pill, PrEP Truvada, that is up to 92% effective at preventing HIV infection, according to the CDC. It requires taking a pill daily, along with regular blood monitoring. This has really changed the sex lives of couples that are of different HIV statuses.
Do What You Are Comfortable Doing
The main thing to remember is that choosing to be intimate is a decision that you make when you are ready. Don’t rush it! Sex is supposed to be fun, hot, amazing, great, intense and more; but, if you are worried about anything, it loses that appeal. So be honest with your potential partner. Most individuals living with HIV will appreciate the opportunity to hear your concerns and you may give them reason to share even more information about HIV. Nerds can certainly be hot, in my opinion.
