You Have to Want It
Do you really want to go there? Sometimes people have butt sex because they want to please a partner. Being a pleaser in bed is a beautiful quality in a person, but if you are only having anal sex to please your partner, then your body may not cooperate. Here's why.
The sphincter muscles need to be a bit relaxed at the point of penetration. If someone tries to enter your butt but you really don’t want to receive penetration, your sphincter muscles will naturally resist and that will result in pain.
Read: A First Timer's Guide to Anal Sex
Good anal sex should not hurt. It may feel strange and a little bit out of control, but it should not hurt. If it does, listen to your body and stop.
However, if you are full of honest curiosity and excitement with the idea of anal sex and your have a moment at the beginning to take a deep breath and consciously relax your muscles, penetration will be easier and fun.
I also highly recommend warming up with other kinds of play before anal penetration. Your warmup could be with toys, vaginal penetration, making out, grinding, or anything else that excites you.
Lube for Anal Sex
The second thing you need for great anal sex is a high-quality lubricant. The butt is not self-lubricating like a vagina can be, so lube is essential.
Don’t use just anything you find around your home, like Vaseline or coconut oil for anal sex. I recommend a very thick gel lubricant. A thicker gel lubricant will be long lasting and stays where you put it.
