Try Reverse Missionary: Not Your Parents’ Missionary Position

Author’s Note: While reverse missionary is often considered a sex position for cis-gendered heterosexual couples, this position is great for any adult, regardless of gender or sexual preference.

Trying new sex positions is not only fun, it’s also a great way to spice up your relationship. You've probably tried the missionary sex position before, probably so many times that it's pretty boring by now. Not surprising, as it's one of the most common sex positions. But have you ever heard of the Reverse Missionary position?

Yep, that’s a thing! What is it? How do you do it? And, who is it best for? Read on, dear intimate explorer, to discover everything you ever wanted to know about this incredible sex position.

What is the reverse missionary position?

If there is one preoccupation that we humans are very inventive with, it's coming up with new sex positions and ways to share intimacy. Hence, twists on classic sex positions, like missionary.

In a nutshell, the reverse missionary position (aka inverted missionary position or upside down missionary) is the exact opposite of regular missionary position. This means the receiving partner gets on top, while the penetrating partner lays below. While this may sound a lot like Cowgirl position, or Female Superior position, it's a bit different. Many people also confuse it with tucked missionary sex position, or reverse anal, which it also is not.

Instead of the receiver sitting on their partner’s lap, they lie on top of their partner, between their lover’s legs, and extending their own out straight behind them. To aid the person on top, they can support their weight with their hands planted next to their partner’s sides. The partner on the bottom can then penetrate the receiving partner, either vaginally or anally.

Who is this position best for?

Reverse missionary sex position can be enjoyed by any couple regardless of gender or sexual preference. It is especially great for couples who like low impact sex, or a position that is more romantic and intimate, as it offers deeper connection through full body contact, eye gazing, and kissing.

For penetrating partners who may suffer from back pain during missionary style, reverse missionary may offer some reprieve. For more support, those with back pain can tuck a pillow or sex furniture under their back or hips, to relieve stress on the lower back.

This is an ideal position for G-spot stimulation, which allows for shallow targeted penetration. Since this is also a grinding position that allows the receiver to rub their genitals against the base of their partner’s penis, dildo, thigh, or hand, it's great for clitoral and vulva stimulation.

Because of the shallow thrusting this position facilitates, it may also be a good alternative for people who have a tilted cervix, or experience pelvic pain during sex.

Read More: Great Sex Positions for A Tilted Cervix

Like cowgirl position, reverse missionary gives the receiver more control and may feel psychologically more active, empowering and assertive. This can be a huge turn on for the penetrating partner as well, by switching things up if they are used to being in a more dominant role.

To further intensify this role reversal, add restraints with hand and ankle cuffs, like under the bed restraints, on the bottom partner. Or the partner on top can hold their lover’s wrists down to increase their dominance.

There are lots of ways to expand upon and explore this position together, which gives you a fresh take on regular missionary position.

Reverse Missionary Variations

There are a few things you can do to change up this position a bit.

• Instead of keeping their legs straight, the person on the bottom can bend their knees to give them more leverage for better thrusting, as in the picture above. This will lessen the strain on their back as well.
• The penetrating partner can take it easy and be more passive as the receiver bounces, wiggles, rocks, thrusts their hips, and grinds on top of their partner.
• Put a ring on it! This position allows for the use of sex toys including a cock ring. You can choose one that vibrates, like the Satisfyer Signet or Fun Factory NŌS, offering more stimulation to the clitoris for vulva owners and women.
• The person on top can lay flat against their partner’s chest for deeper connection, or arch their back and raise up on their arms, to allow their lover to stimulate their nipples and breasts. Or get kinky and try some nipple clamps.
• This position can be performed by men and other penis owners, as well as two women or vulva owners. In the latter situation, either partner can wear a strap-on or change up position, in what has been called Lesbian Reverse Missionary position. Try a strapless strap-on which gives both the receiver and the penetrator extra stimulation.
• This position can also be modified for anal sex, including pegging, as well (aka anal missionary position). To accommodate this, the receiver may want to move their hips further up their partner’s body to facilitate anal penetration.
• No penetration? Yes, outercourse is a thing too, and you may want to explore this position for snuggling, humping or grinding, without penetrative sex, sans clothes or not. This gives you another hot option for heavy petting, and may be perfect for couples who want to abstain from penetrative sex.

Seriously, there are so many fun ways you can modify this position that the possibilities are only limited by your imagination!

How to do reverse missionary

Okay, let’s get into the nitty-gritty of how to do reverse missionary sex position.

1. Warm Up: As with any sex position, it is always good to get hot and bothered first via foreplay and other forms of arousal.
2. Lube It Up: With penetrative sex, and grinding stimulation, adding a sexual lubricant beforehand will go a long way in making this sex position so much better. Lube is not just an accessory anymore!
3. Get Into Position: The penetrating partner lies on their back with their legs straight out, or knees bent. The receiving partner then crawls on top, between their lover’s legs, so they are pelvis to pelvis, body to body, facing each other.
4. Find Your Variation: Another way to get into this position is to start in missionary, then do a switch-a-roo, where the penetrating partner rolls over and lifts the receiving partner along with them, so they end up on top. This requires a bit of maneuvering and strong upper body strength on the penetrating partner’s part. Still, another way is for the receiving partner to start in cowgirl position, and then straighten her legs and lay on top of her partner. See which way works best for you.
5. Grind and Humping: With the receiver on top, they can grind, hump, and rotate their hips to get the best stimulation, both internally and externally, while the person on the bottom lays back and enjoys the experience. They can also move their hips and trust in time with their partner as well.
6. Adding Toys: From there, feel free to add sex toys, bondage toys, or anything else that aids in your mutual sexual pleasure.

Extra Tips for Reverse Missionary

Try using your hands, mouth, or even a sex toy to help stimulate your partner’s erogenous zones. Small vibrators are very effective for grinding with when placed strategically between two bodies. One or both partners may even experiment with anal play by using a butt plug.

If you choose to grind and prolong the pleasure, you could even try edging to take this position to a whole new level of ecstasy.

More Sex Positions Similar to Reverse Missionary

You may be asking yourself, since reverse missionary is so amazing, are there any other similar positions we can try. The answer, is, Yes, my friend there are!

Don’t worry, we won’t suggest anything as crazy as Reverse Helicopter position, where the penetrator spins around on top of their partner by their penis! Actually… I think someone just made that one up!

Here are a few more positions you may want to try out.  

High Dive Position

The high dive position is a woman on top (or receiver on top) position. It is actually very similar to the reverse missionary position, except the person on top pushes themselves up by holding hands with their partner, or extending their arms with palms planted on either side of their partner. To further support the receiver, they hook their toes on top of their partner’s feet.

Facing Spoon Position

Another very intimate face-to-face position is the facing spoon position. This one is rather relaxed and very easy. You both lay on your sides face-to-face. The receiver can lift their top leg a bit, or straddle it over their lover’s thigh, which allows for the giver to penetrate them.

Cowgirl and Reverse Cowgirl

The cowgirl and reverse cowgirl are two very popular receiver on top positions (also called rider, cowboy, or woman-on-top positions, depending on the gender). These positions are great because they give the receiver more control and ability to stimulate the clitoris and G-spot. These positions are also hugely empowering for someone who is used to being more passive during sex.

Tabletop Position

If you like cowgirl, then you are going to love the tabletop position. Like it sounds, the receiver sits on a tabletop or counter (make sure it is very sturdy!), with their bum as close to the edge as possible. Next, the penetrating partner then stands in front of them, face-to-face, and enters the receiving partner. From there, the receiver can hug their partner’s waist with their legs, rest their ankles on their partner’s shoulders, arch back, or cuddle close. You can even adapt this position for oral sex. It’s all good!

Read More: Best Oral Sex Positions When You Want to Get Wild

The Bottom Line

Experimenting with reverse missionary can be very exciting by switching up sexual role and adding D/s role playing scenarios. It is also a great position that allows the penetrating partner, or person on the bottom to fondle and caress the person on top.

So, that’s it, intrepid explorer! While it may sound complicated, reverse missionary couldn’t be simpler, and with all the ways you can modify it, it should definitely be on your sex position bucket list.

Go play, experiment, and have fun!